


Fuck the cute straight boys (not literally)

by nickwritesstuff



Series: Kleinsen~ [4]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Crushes, Drinking, Everyone Is Gay, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Gay Panic, Getting Together, M/M, Not Beta Read, Pining, Spin the Bottle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-21
Updated: 2019-05-21
Packaged: 2020-03-09 03:46:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18908899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nickwritesstuff/pseuds/nickwritesstuff
Summary: Jared was fed up with his friends, especially Evan Painfully Straight Hansen he'd been pining over for years. Maybe a party would help and distract him.Or maybe not.





	Fuck the cute straight boys (not literally)

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of you seemed to like Confident!Evan in a previous oneshot of mine called "Love me for real", so I thought I'd give it another go.

Jared was seriously done with cute straight boys. Oh, who was he trying to fool? He was done with that one cute straight boy who was looking at him like he hung the moon and the stars. Whose hair was dirty blonde, and it looked ridiculously soft. Who had these huge blue eyes that made Jared weak in the knees. Who was now looking at him, almost scared, only a bottle between them. This was not how he imagined this day would go.

It all started with Michael's text. He and Jeremy were invited to a party, and he wanted Jared and Evan to come along. Jared tried to tell him Evan wasn't a fan of parties, Michael somehow convinced them to go.

It was at a house they'd never been before, so that was already fun. They were almost there, just the road separating them from the house when Jared looked at Evan. He tried to look confident, but his shaking hands said otherwise. Jared sighed and linked their fingers together with an internal scream.

"Look, we just go in, say hi, and go home." he tried to calm Evan (and himself) down. He forced a grin. "Don't be a pussy."

"I'm not a pussy." Evan mumbled. Jared wanted to cry when Evan looked at him. Determination filled his eyes, but sometimes his anxiety shined through. "Let's go."

Jared pressed the bell when they arrived. The house itself was nice - well, it seemed nice in the dark. The music was way too loud to Jared's taste and there were too many cars on the street, parking. The door opened to reveal Rich.

"YOOOO!" he yelled, shaking Jared's free hand, then Evan's. "Jeremy's at the back with the others. I'm bringing them booze, wanna come?"

Jared looked at Evan, who hesitantly nodded. "Sure." he said with a shrug, and followed Rich into the kitchen. The house was pretty big, but it was full of drunk teenagers, so it didn't feel like it. Evan's grip on Jared's hand tightened. Jared nodded, he knew this was awful. Rich quickly found some bottles full of something, and he placed some in Jared's arms as well. Now that he saw the label, he realized it was just beer.

They made their way into the backyard, where a few drunk girls were sleeping. After Jared managed not to step on them or drop the beers, he finally saw their friends sitting around a table. Almost everyone was there: Michael, Jeremy, Jake, Jenna, Brooke, Chloe, even Christine.

"Hey guys." Jeremy grinned. Now that they were outside and the music wasn't filling their heads, they could hear each other more easily.

"Hi." Evan smiled slightly, still gripping Jared's hand like his life depended on it. Michael looked at them and raised a brow. That fucker had the nerve to smirk. Jared shot him a deathglare, which earned an even more annoying grin.

"We were just starting spin the bottle." Brooke said, looking too excited. She was probably drunk.

"It's like this weird one." Jake motioned towards the table. Sure enough, the bottle was resting on top of something that looked like a boardgame. In the dark, Jared could see words like _"sit in lap"_ and _"make out"_.

"Yeah, it's fun." Rich took a seat next to Chris. "First you spin a person, then a dare."

"Uh..." Jared looked around. "Sounds fun, but we were actually leaving."

"Nonsense, come on." Chloe pulled him down next to her, forcing Jared to let go of Evan's hand. "Just a few rounds."

Evan sighed and sat next to Jeremy. Jared rolled his eyes. He loved these guys, but they were seriously annoying.

"Okay, let's start!" Jenna clapped, her phone never leaving her hand. Jared's eyebrows rose. Oh fuck, they were planning something. His suspicions turned out to be true when Brooke pressed the bottle into his hand.

He placed it in the middle of their somewhat circle, and spinned. Then more than one thing happened at the same time. Chloe looked like she threw something at a drunk girl, who started yelling, and while everyone was staring at her, the bottle stopped. When Jared saw it, he looked at Jeremy, whose hand was way too close to the bottle to be accidental. Jared sighed. The fucking bottle was pointing at Evan.

No. Jared refused to believe this was real. He clenched his fists until his nails were buried deep in his palms. It hurt. Okay, so he was not dreaming. Maybe high? He could've gotten high and forgot about it, it happened before. But no, he stopped after Evan told him to, about two or three months earlier. Plus, his hallucinations were never this realistic. This means this was the reality.

So there they were, staring at each other, Jared having a mental breakdown, and Evan... Evan just looked scared. Jared sighed and spinned again with shaking hands. This time, they all leaned forward to see where the bottle would land. Jared found himself hoping it'd be something innocent, for example kiss on the cheek. The slowed down, and then...

"Make out in partner's lap!" Michael yelled, looking pleased. No, no, no, this wasn't happening. Except it was, because now everyone was looking at Jared expectantly, even Evan. So he did what he wanted to do since ninth grade and made his way towards Evan to sit on his lap. Only he couldn't quite reach his mouth, so he placed a leg on each side of Evan, straddling him while trying not to fall off the bench.

"You ready?" he asked, voice rough. Evan didn't break eye contact as he nodded and pulled Jared closer, until their lips touched. Jared immediately closed his eyes and cupped Evan's face with his hands. God, this was... Everything. And then Evan parted Jared's lips with his tongue, and holy shit. This was a whole new sensation, and suddenly it was unbearably hot, but as Evan ran a hand down Jared's spine, he shivered.

He forgot there were people watching, forgot Evan was straight, because he was all around him, and all that mattered was this kiss. Jared moved even closer, effectively deepening the said kiss, trying to savour the moment. Oh, he was so going to think about this at night. And then his lungs reminded him he needed oxygen to not pass out. He pulled back to look at Evan's face, trying to focus on him instead of the spinning world around them.

You know, when you do something incredibly stupid, your brain tries to convince you it's not real. Jared had to learn that this happened when he'd done something he'd been dreaming about for five years. Evan's blue eyes were shining with an emotion Jared rarely saw, and even though he didn't quite know what it was, he wanted to see it again. He huffed, not knowing if he should laugh or not. It was quiet, so very quiet.

But every good thing has to end. Before Jared could even react to anything, for example how soft Evan's hair was, the noise came back. The source of it was mainly his group of friends, who were cheering, trading money, and Jared was pretty sure Jenna was recording them.

He hesitantly looked back at Evan, whose hands were around Jared's waits, and oh fuck, his lips were shining after the kiss. After Jared kissed him. All the things he wanted to do to Evan flooded his mind, making him weak in the knees... _Okay, calm down, Kleinman._

"So..." Evan smiled sheepishly. "This happened."

"Yeah." Jared nodded, feeling dumb. What was he supposed to say after he basically made out with his probably straight crush for Lord knows how long? He noticed his hands were on Evan's chest. He had a nice chest, not too wide, but- oh, what the hell was he still doing in Evan's lap?

He mumbled a quick apology before climbing off of Evan. The air suddenly felt much colder. The game continued with Jeremy getting _"whisper something to partner that'll make them blush"_. It only took him like five seconds before Michael pulled his hood up to cover his face. Then, after a surprisingly enthusiastic lap dance Jenna got from Brooke, Rich spinned _"7 mins in_ _ _heaven__ _"_ with Jake. They winked as they made their way back to the house in order to find a room.

"They won't come back." Chloe rolled her eyes, taking a sip of her beer. The others nodded, and slowly started to part from each other. Brooke grabbed Jenna's arm and pulled her inside, because she wanted to dance. Jeremy and Michael went back as well with Christine, trying to find some sort of game. Eventually only Jared, Evan and Chloe stayed at the table.

As Chloe finished her beer, she threw the bottle to the ground and stood up. "I can't breathe from the sexual tension, so bye." she explained, and left them alone. Jared buried his face in his hands, and wished for the ground to open and get him out of here.

"We should... talk." Evan said, making Jared cringe. Oh god, this was gonna be awkward as hell.

Jared sighed and downed his drink. "Look, I won't be like an experiment." he said, looking directly at Evan.

"What?" he asked, but Jared only shook his head. How was the guy so... clueless, oblivious, innocent, adorable- **_stop_** _, Kleinman._

"I don't want to be a straight boy's newest toy." he tried to explain, now fiddling with the empty beer bottle. "I'm done with your kind. Y'all are fucking awful. Mainly you."

"Then it's a good thing I'm not." Evan spoke up after a pause. Jared's bottle hit the ground. "Straight, I mean."

"Oh." Jared couldn't say anything else. This had to be a joke. A very bad one.

"Oh?" Evan raised a brow. Jared clenched his fists again.

"Very funny." he said, voice dangerously low. "Make fun of the hopeless gay guy, sure."

"Wh- Jared, it's not- it's not a joke." Evan stuttered. Jared didn't know he still did that. "I'm bisexual."

Jared was speechless again. The table under his hands was textured. He took his time trying to find smooth parts, just so he didn't have to look at Evan.

"So..." Evan said eventually. "Why am I awful?"

Jared blushed. He wanted to say so many things.

 _Because you're cute. Because every time you smile, I die a little, and even though it's fucking cheesy, it's true. Because your hair is too soft, and it's not fair. Because your eyes are just beautiful, and it's fucking irritating._ _Because you're an amazing kisser, and I want more._

Evan's eyes were wide when Jared's own met them. Jared bit his lip. "Did I-"

"Yes." Evan nodded, not waiting to hear the question. Jared's head hit the table. Hard. He had a habit of sharing his thoughts with the world without noticing when he was tired, and he was exhausted.

"Fuck." he said simply, head still resting on the table. Great, he just messed up the best thing that's ever happened to him, just because he couldn't shut up. Absolutely perfect.

"Jared." Evan said hesitantly. Jared groaned in response. "I don't hate you. I don't think I'm even capable of hating you."

Jared looked up to find Evan staring at the boardgame between them.

"I never got a turn." he explained, still eyeing the game. Jared felt a certain warm feeling creep up his neck to his cheeks. "I guess I won't have to spin to get a person."

Jared let out a heavy breath, trying to stay calm. The literal love of his life just told him he had a chance, and now wanted to play this absurd game with him? What?

Evan spinned the bottle, and Jared found his eyes glued on it. It slowed down. Jared didn't dare to breathe, until it fully stopped on _"kiss on the cheek"_. Evan sighed, and nudged the table slightly, so the bottle moved a bit to the left.

It was on _"GET A ROOM_ _!_ _"_.

"What?" Evan asked, laughing a little when he saw Jared's face. Jared didn't know how he looked, probably shocked and red. Mainly red. "If Jeremy could move the bottle-"

"Wait, you knew?" Jared interrupted him, and bit his lip immediately afterwards.

"It was pretty obvious." Evan smiled innocently. Far too innocently, in case you wanted to know Jared's opinion.

"And you still kept playing." Jared tried to steady his breathing, and failed miserably. "Why?"

"Why did you?" Evan shrugged, still smiling sweetly. "I didn't think I'd get another chance to kiss you."

It was like the air disappeared from Jared's lungs. He laughed awkwardly before standing up. Evan followed his lead. "So what now?"

"How about," Evan stepped closer and pressed his lips to Jared's for a moment, "we get that room?"

Jared's eyes widened a bit. "Are you ready for that?"

"I've been ready for years." Evan pulled him closer. "Are you?"

"Fuck yes." Jared breathed, kissing Evan again before heading back to the house. They had a dare to finish.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos make me feel alive~


End file.
